~ Matthew 11:28 - 30, The Message
One of the experiences I had, up on the mountain, was during a moment of meditation. I had a hard time settling in to the meditation. After several attempts to quiet and still myself, my attention was directed outside to the rain. I then heard, "Go into the rain." Well, even though it wasn't raining hard, it WAS lightening, and I WAS on a mountain - which made me closer to the lightening! So I argued with my guides. (Again, those who know me well, know that I tend to argue with my guides when I don't want to follow their directions, for one reason or another). Well, after some debate, I relented and went out to the balcony. Once I got out there, and in somewhat of a snarky response to the conditions, I asked, "Now what?" And I was told, "Surrender." Again, I went into debate mode, "I'm outside, in the rain and lightening, how much more can I surrender?" Again, I was told, "You need to fully surrender." So, I followed their directions, sat down in half-lotus in the rain and lightening, and continued the meditation. After some time, I slowly came back into my body and I realized that the rain had stopped, and it was sunny out. I sat longer, taking it all in: the smell from the fresh rain, the beauty of the mountains, the warmth of the sun. Indeed, I did surrender, and the payoff was more than I could have asked for. The gratitude I felt was overwhelming!
There was another point during sabbatical that I was feeling so exhausted and I asked if I could just unplug for five minutes. Unplug from it all - spirituality, my life, my health, etc. I felt like this question was not just ME asking, but several of my clients that had brought that question into their session and I haven't quite known how to answer it. These particular clients were either new to their spiritual path, or are so tired of peeling the layers of healing that they just wanted to stop for a bit. And all of a sudden I found myself wanting to unplug. So, I asked it here. And the answer I received was, "What then?" Huh, I pondered that answer. Indeed, what then.....I pondered this answer for some time. Do we not create our own reality? I realized I COULD choose to unplug, but that would mean that I am either dead, or at the least, not growing or healing. Therefore, I have made a conscious decision to keep on keeping on. My reality is that I am here to serve. The journey may be bumpy at times, but with the help from God and the Universe, I am strong. And, I vow to still myself, as often as necessary, to learn the unforced rhythms of grace, to live freely and lightly.